A large wave breaking against a rock splashing up

Finding strength and purpose when life pulls you off course

I’ve been like an untethered boat drifting out in the deepest of seas for far too long. Out there in the unknown, where gusts howl like hungry wolves and waves tower beyond measure. “What do you want from me?!” My voice drowned in the stormy wind, I held on for dear life to the flicker of my dreams.

I hated it. The unknown. I wanted to know, no, I needed to know. I anticipate, plan, prepare and that’s what makes me feel safe.

But, in this wide open sea that’s mostly been relentless in its harassing of me, I have learned that nowhere is safe, and that I can never really know. That is an illusion.

I have realized that it’s here, in the unknown, where I become known. In the rough seas, I see me. Will the person I become save me? That is who I want to be. Able. Brave. Strong. But more often than not, I find myself shrinking away. I keep fighting, lifting my head every day. That must count for something, I hope and pray.

These wild waters have carved lessons on my soul, and pain and sorrows have shaped me anew. There’s little choice in what life throws our way; the fantasy that we have control can evaporate in a day. A cruel awakening from our comfortable rest, or life’s way of calling us to deeper waters?

Surrender. This word follows me through life, again. Rigidly holding on to the picture I planned kept me from what may be, but this sea has pried open my white-knuckled fists. Loss clouded me like thick smoke and all I could see was my dwindling hope. I stopped. Right at the edge of a very dark place, I decided to turn.

Now, I see a faint light in the distance, painting a new picture I can’t yet make out. Maybe I’ll wake up to a whale spout, on a calm sea with thousands of stars shining only for me. Or maybe it will be the break of dawn over the never-ending horizon, with the most beautiful colors I have ever seen and crystal clear waters inviting me in.

Whatever it may be, it will be new and wonderful and built from scratch. Beauty made from the ashes. And I am able, braver than I’ve ever been and stronger than I ever dreamed. That’s what I’m becoming, navigating these treacherous seas.

I cannot yet clearly see, but it was never meant to be. Lest I focus only with the end in sight, I’ll miss all the adventures of the in-between, the here and now.

So, here I am, waters. “Here I am, seas, do as you like!” I’ll either make it to the other side, with stories to tell of adventures with those I love by my side. Or I’ll go down to the deep watery grave knowing that at least I was brave. I enjoyed every moment of building a life, with moments and memories made in the in-between. Life is now, I need to live it.

powered by social2s
24 September Personal Growth 35

Finding strength and purpose when life pulls you off course

I’ve been like an untethered boat drifting out in the deepest of seas for far too long. Out there in the unknown, where gusts howl like hungry wolves and waves tower beyond measure. “What do you want

...
24 September Scuba & Exploration 29

Along South Africa's stunning R44 coastal route, between Gordon's Bay and Kleinmond, lies a hidden underwater paradise that few get to experience firsthand. The Kogelberg Biosphere Reserve, where two ocean currents create a unique marine ecosystem that hosts over 3,500

...

Have you ever dreamed of exploring vibrant coral reefs or swimming alongside majestic sea creatures? Many aspiring divers rush straight from certification to their bucket-list dive destinations, eager to experience these underwater wonders. But here's a reality check from someone who's seen it

...

Part of a Three-Part Series on Underwater Photography Etiquette

Imagine calmly watching an octopus as

...

Part 2 of a Three-Part Series on Underwater Photography Etiquette

You've just invested thousands in your dream underwater camera setup. Then, you miss that once-in-a-lifetime moment of

...

Part 1 of a Three-Part Series on Underwater Photography Etiquette

A large sea turtle glided through the warm tropical water off the reef next to the dive group, its shell catching glints of sunlight. Just as I raised my camera to capture this

...

Have you ever wondered what secrets lie beneath the cold waters of Cape Town's coastline? For underwater photographers and adventure seekers, Hout Bay's historic shipwrecks offer a thrilling journey into maritime history. In this second installment of our wreck diving series, we descend into

...

Have you ever wondered what secrets lie beneath the waves where historic ships met their fate? Off the coast of Cape Town's Hout Bay, where the Atlantic's waters have claimed countless vessels over centuries, four remarkable shipwrecks tell fascinating stories of maritime history. In Part 1 of

...
23 December Scuba & Exploration 362

Protea Banks is a world-renowned dive site that promises exhilarating underwater adventures. Located off the KwaZulu-Natal coast, it offers a unique blend of vibrant marine ecosystems and thrilling encounters with apex predators like sharks.

Dive into the excitement of Protea Banks,

...
22 December Scuba & Exploration 319

Have you ever watched underwater documentaries and thought, "I wish I could do that... but it's probably too difficult/dangerous/expensive"? You're not alone. Many aspiring divers let common misconceptions hold them back from discovering an extraordinary underwater world that's more accessible

...
21 December Personal Growth 313

Navigating Life After Matric: The Power of a Gap Year

Are you feeling the pressure to have your entire life figured out as you finish matric? You're not alone. While friends and family eagerly ask about your plans, it's perfectly normal to feel uncertain about your next

...
21 December Scuba & Exploration 317

Discover the Diverse Marine Ecosystems

Where two oceans meet, a spectacular underwater world awaits. Cape Town's marine environment offers an extraordinary diving experience, from encounters with Great White Sharks and playful seals to explorations of magnificent kelp forests and

...
21 December Scuba & Exploration 343

Gordon's Bay, a hidden gem in False Bay, South Africa, boasts some of the most spectacular sea fan forests and vibrant marine life you'll ever encounter. But timing your dive right is crucial for the best experience.

In our comprehensive guide to dive conditions in Gordon's Bay, we

...
21 December Personal Growth 273

Have you ever noticed how life's most meaningful journeys often begin unexpectedly? In "The Art of Being Chosen," a touching narrative unfolds about two unlikely companions that transformed one person's life: a feral tuxedo cat and the craft of writing. This heartwarming story weaves together

...
06 December Digital Marketing 378

You've found it - that perfect, clever domain name that makes you smile. Maybe it's a witty wordplay or uses one of those trendy new domain extensions. Before you click "purchase," consider that this creative domain name might undermine your business's

...
14 November Digital Marketing 613

As a Web Content Manager and Designer, I've seen countless beautifully designed websites fail to generate results because they're treated like digital business cards instead of marketing tools.

Your website should work for you. Think of a static website like a

...
01 November Digital Marketing 1310

The Importance of Content Marketing

What is content marketing? It’s a top way to showcase your products or services to potential customers by creating and distributing valuable, relevant content to attract and engage your target audience. I will focus on using blog articles, a highly

...
01 November Digital Marketing 1221

The Importance of Content Marketing

What is content marketing? It’s a top way to showcase your products or services to potential customers by creating and distributing valuable, relevant content to attract and engage your target audience. I will focus on

...
Use of Images & Content of Website
© Madelein Wolfaardt 2023. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this website’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Madelein Wolfaardt with appropriate and specific direction and links to the original content.